Read from the bottom up after the jump.
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"[Chaos is] intended to be relentlessly fun; we assume if you're tuning into CBS, you're looking for fun." Tom Spezialy has never seen CBS.
Ostroff says The CW's success in TV is only overshadowed by their success online. I'm not sure I would have said that out loud.
This Kickass Women of The CW panel is gonna be followed by The Sexual Harrassment Seminar of the Viacom.
I've got to believe there is an alt universe where #VeronicaMars & #Terriers are tops in ratings & nobody has heard of Snooki.
Writers of SPN are creating a show for Sarah Michelle Gellar. Please excuse me while I fangirl out. WOOOOWEEEEEWAAAA!
If this is real- I die. RT @TVMoJoe #Buffy fans, you may explode: SMG is returning to TV via new CBS show. http://bit.ly/h8SFFZ
That last message is NOT breaking news. I realize that.
It's over. Now everyone is going to drink. #TCA
From what it sounds like, stylists for the CW #TCA panel didn't realize that being a Kick-Ass Woman doesn't mean you need to show your ass.
I'm barely looking at the stage anymore. Too much leg crossing and adjusting and it's making me uncomfortable.
The CW at #TCA: A reporter notes some of their characters kill people. I assume they're not talking about HELLCATS.
"I think a guy who doesn't like a tough chick is a loser." - Maggie Q, likely to be the panel's most-tweeted line.
I'm now copy editing the CW's press materials. They are woeful.#tca
"We're in a tough category in terms of being believable in this genre," observes Maggie Q. She's smart.
If we all drank everytime a Kick-Ass Woman of the CW said "kick-ass" on this panel, we would have all died 20 minutes ago.
OH MY GOD. EVERYBODY STOP SAYING KICKASS. #tca
The CW has also seated the blondes to the left, brunettes to the right. #hereiam #stuckinthemiddlewithyou #tca
The "Kick-Ass Women of the CW" panel is wearing all black, as if they've come directly from the funeral of Michigan J. Frog. #TCA
I choose radio silence in this session. Based on the length of Maggie Q's dress, anything I say can and will be used against me.
The kick-ass women of the #CW are up next. Normally, I could kick their ass, but since I'm sleepy, I think I'm in trouble. #TCA
It's late Friday on the next to last day of #tca. Spirits have flagged. And you know what that means. VANDERDANCEPARTY!
When is Les Moonves going to put The CW out of its misery? You know he wants to. Yet here we are. #tca
"I have never cried on a treadmill." Sara Rue would make AWFUL reality television. #tca
I'm going to wait for surgery spinoffs "Lap Band for the Wedding Band" and "Suctioned for the Function."
When Dawn Ostroff is finished touting her Network's "growth," can someone please ask her to comment on ratings for THE GAME on BET #TCA
"Shedding for the Wedding" manages to simultaneously reenforce the necessity of thinness and matrimony.
The CW's "Shedding fot the Wedding" is apparently about loss of weight, not hair. Or skin. #tca
Hey, it's time for me and the 5 other people in world who care about it to sit down and be disappointed by Human Target!
The CW has already begun shooting its first pilot, "Danni Lowinski." Yeah. *That* title isn't gonna get changed.
Oh, CW, don't ever change. They are showing stats that say they've had bigger growth than any network. Too tired to even mock that.
Paul Hewitt introduces Dawn Ostroff as the original kick ass woman of the CW. She says she's been called worse. By some of us.#touche #TCA
If The CW's Kick Ass women panel does not feature Tasha coming onstage with a shovel to enormous applause, Press Tour is WORTHLESS.
Ugh, I hate phone plan research. It's worse than watching Bones.
And now for something completely different: The CW is coming up next. They have "Kick-Ass Women of the CW" panel. Oh, dear.
My irritation with this show is keeping me upright. RT @writerchica: I can't help but notice how awake @sepinwall seems.
Critics: We already had an "Episodes" panel discussing Matt LeBlanc's fictional penis. Can we NOT do that again?
"Porn is real people having sex on film, and these people aren't real, so no, I don't think we've ever gone too far" - Tom Kapinos #TCA
I don't like Californication, but it's supremely watchable. You can watch a whole season before you even realize you have. It's like eating an entire bag of Double Stuf Oreos in one sitting.#tca
Things getting awkward at Californication panel, as only one reporter seems to like the show enough to keep asking questions.
Wow, there's a lot of Californication hate on my Twitter feed right now. #TCA
CBS stands by Charlie Sheen and his hit sitcom. Warns boring guy on 'Shit My Dad Says' that same thing does not apply to him, so behave.
"Californication" clip reel reminds me what bugs me about supposedly "adult" comedy: its juvenile fondness for "retarded" and "retard." #tca
Ugh. Californication. I hate you, America.
Somebody asked how #Shameless would be affected if Frank died in a drunk driving accident. Ouch. Macy: "What a buzzkill." #TCA
Audience for #JerseyShore last night was more than the total number of gyms, tanning salons and laudromats in New Jersey
#LiesForeignShowrunnersTellUs RT @IMDbTV: Paul Abbott, creator of UK's #Shameless, says H'wood did not bastardize his vision#Episodes. #TCA
"No, not one," says original "Shameless" creator Paul Abbott on whether he's had any "Episodes" moments.
"When people ask me about my vision for Showtime, I like to cite Shameless." - Nevins
Neil Jordan is trying to say "The Borgia" de-emphasizes orgies and incest. I know. What's the point, right?
This one reporter keeps asking more questions about gigolos.#presstourfatiguehassetin
"Its not like we’re trying to appeal to a demo.We want women+men.We want anybody who wants to write a check every month."-Nevins on Showtime
Showtime: "It's about being deep and psychologically sophisticated and taking people where they don't usually go."
Then he says, "It's not a plot-driven show. It's fundamentally a character-driven show." #showtime #tca #alsonoooooo
Wait, #Showtime thinks a show about gigolos in Vegas fits its brand but a mini-series on The Kennedys doesn't? #IHeartPremiumCable#TCA
"What it came down to is it didn't really feel like Showtime, it didn't feel like premium cable." - Nevins on The Kennedys.
"Episodes is a hardcore funny half-hour," says David Nevins. I think roughly 3/4 of this room would disagree. #showtime #tca
One hour unscripted series of professional baseball - it will follow MY WORLD SERIES CHAMPION SF GIANTS... Nevins said he considered the Dodgers, but wanted "winners." And "a real baseball team." I totally made that up for Dodger friends.
"I was looking for a cable show and I landed on network. I got my cable show; it's just on CBS." -Julianna Margulies
"I need literally everything in words" - Julianne after she gets confused and thinks LGBT is the new law firm name.#TheGoodWife #TCA
"I have sex with a sheet-cake in the second episode... Spoiler alert," Biggs says. This amuses Sarah Chalke.
All my tweets today have been first drafts...I will be revising and putting out pink tweets later this afternoon.
"Chaos" is about the low-tech bureaucracy of the intelligence biz. So "Rubicon." Only... not.
Bret Ratner directed the #Chaos pilot. That probably speaks volumes about why I didn't enjoy it. #CBS #TCA
Freddy Rodriguez's story of being peed on by a scorpion is maybe not the best "Chaos" selling point.
CBS is at #tca at the moment and talking about the spring show "Chaos," which is about wacky CIA officers. Yes, wacky CIA officers.
MSNBC: Martha Stewart head-butted by her dog. CNN: Who's sitting where at the State of the Union. FoxNews: Huckabee blathering.#sidibouzid
I am relying on someone live-tweeting al-Jazeera to keep up with Tunisia news. MSNBC reports that Martha Stewart's dog split her lip open.
Three cable news nets are all over Tunisia uprising reports right now. #LOL #justkiddin #thisisamerica #tunwheresia
Summation of Tassler's executive session: It's all good. Thank you and have a good day. And you know what, she's right. CBS ain't broke.
Nina Tassler is confident CBS and Mark Harmon will come to an agreement. Honestly though, what else would he do?
CBS president: "We have tremendous respect for our audience." Unless they are Survivor fans who don't like Russell's return.
Let's be concerned for the women around him. RT @TVGuide CBS Pres, Nina Tassler says she has a "high level" of concern about Charlie Sheen
"Ultimately, they're coming back for the characters," Tassler says for why #CBS' crime shows are so successful. #tca
Unspinning Tassler's personal concern for Charlie Sheen, it's basically, he's a drunk and a screw-up but hey, he shows up for work on time.
Hah. First question is about Charlie "Teflon" Sheen. Tassler deadpans, "I really didn't expect that question this morning." #TCA
"And now here's a woman who never expected to have a dancing horse as a lead-in... again." -@craigyferg intro'ing Nina Tassler
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